Tom Fletcher, one man's work.

[John7]

Originally Posted by Paul Barker

i should have been born in Chaucers time when you spelt how you liked.

And Garrard 301/401s were new!

[James D]

Shane, Paul,

As a fellow suffer I relate so much to what you are saying... Particularly the bit about the positives but it wasn't easy growing up - I suffer from dyscalculia too so my arithmetic is all over the place but my maths comprehension is good... it took a while to convince my teachers at school that I could actually do it and so be allowed to do double maths at A level so I could do the degree I wanted to...

My wife has neither and after nearly 30 years of marriage still doesn't understand properly that I can't spell consistantly and that if she gives me more than three numbers at a time in a sequence I can't cope with it...

James

[Paul Barker]

"I just got beaten at regular intervals for being a lazy little sod."

I went to an all male boarding school where we were beaten on mass because one boy did something wrong and noone would split. It was a worse fate to be a split than to all take the beating. Once we were beaten so hard at the end of the Summer term, the whole dorm, that when we came back next term we all still had the cut marks of the cane in our backsides.

And don't nobody reply with LOL, I'm not laughing. It was a miserable time.

If there is one thing in he political correct world we now live in that I am very happy about it's that the power for indiscriminate infliction of pain has been removed from these wrotten teachers who abused their postions.

I have a really good mate in the building trade who was brought up in children's homes, he is now a big strong man, actually very strong, but when a vulnerable parentless child he was beaten and torchured daily by one of the male staff for that persons enjoyment. One day after he had grown up he was driving along and saw that member of staff. He said to me "I din't even have to think about it I drove straight at him and pinned him to the wall, got out of the car walked round and said, whose laughing now s****horpe, I hope you die". Don did 2 years for that.

It's a great shame those trusted to give Don a life in the absence family we all should have had screwed him up so much to turn him into that loaded gun. He is the nicest bloke you could ever meat, and absolutely excellent at all aspects of building work, but he won't let anyone get close to him or physically touch him.

I give Don a leg up in life, and enjoy seeing him fulfilled. I can also harness his power in a positive direction. I am not saying that if he saw any of his abusers again he wouldn't turn nasty, but he wouldn't harm another person.

As a paediatric nursing student I always fought the corner in debates of the we shouldn't hit children debate. Most of my fellow students held the view children should be hit. No time or place to go into the arguments but there ae plenty of ways of manipulating children to learn what is right and wrong without beating them. Beating is abuse of strength, a cowards way out.

[The Shadow]

Originally Posted by Paul Barker

No time or place to go into the arguments but there ae plenty of ways of manipulating children to learn what is right and wrong without beating them. Beating is abuse of strength, a cowards way out.

Hi Paul

I agree with you absolutely on that one.

I am as you can no doubt see by the contributions I make to this forum, in no way dyslexic.
I was the only kid from a street full of scallies who went to Grammar school.

I was mercillessly bullied and beaten up at every opportunity for being a "f***ing toffee nosed Grammar grubbing pooftah"

For me during the teenage years the 70s was an unbelievably violent part of my life that I would rather forget; a shallow horrible decade indeed.

Like your mate Don I finally flipped in December 1974 when I was attacked in a park by 17 arseholes and an Alsatian dog. I had completely had it and kicked the **** out of three of my assailants with such venom that the rest of them fled for their lives like the cowards they really were.

God knows I must have looked like some crazed lunatic psychopath to them as it all came out.

It was only busted noses and black eyes the three unfortunate recipients of my pent up rage got, so imagine my horror when my parents received a visit from the boys in blue and I was carted off and charged with assault occasioning actual bodily harm.

I received a £15 fine a mugshot and a criminal record that came back 20 years later to haunt me when I applied for teacher training after being made redundant from BT.

However I was accepted by the Secretary of State, gained a 2:1 became a teacher, then 6 years later Assistant Head of a large primary school.

Because of these experiences I have absolutely zero tolerance for bullying of any sort and as Assistant Head was often in the situation where I was mediating between warring parents whose well boys will be boys Mr Cresswell attitude I refused to accept when telling them in no uncertain terms that:

yes their little Johnny was in fact an obnoxious bullying little reprobate and indeed his behaviour was not going to be tolerated,

and yes he was to be excluded until he and they decided that they were going to start behaving in a sociable and civilised manner towards others.

and yes they were going to have to find someone to look after him whilst they went to work. (Oh dear, how sad, never mind)

It is with great pride that although I have now left that school for a change of direction with Apple Computer and a bit of supply teaching that their recent OFSTED report praised the pastoral policy we put in place and graded us outstanding due to the fact that the kids felt happy, safe and were confident that any bullying issues would be sorted out.

I got out because I couldn't (wouln't) play politics and the sheer stress of constantly having to fight my corner against apathy, blatant stonewalling and mindless bureaucracy from those with infinitely more power than I finally made me decide that I didnt need it (never could toe the line I suppose. That's why I use SE tube amps and FR speakers )

What a bunch we are eh ?

But there is no finer forum on the internet and the friendship, camaraderie etc we have here is something money can't buy. Let's keep it up guys.

Steve.

Edit: I had to include this because it is so unbelievable

A parent with a particularly difficult child once threatened to take me personally to court for ....wait for it....here it comes...."looking at him in a manner that might lower his self-esteem" This after he had thrown a chair at his teacher and told me I was a f***ng four eyed fat b**tard when I was summoned to sort out the mayhem he was causing"

She knew her rights you see.

[Darren D]

Originally Posted by The Shadow

A parent with a particularly difficult child once threatened to take me personally to court for ....wait for it....here it comes...."looking at him in a manner that might lower his self-esteem" This after he had thrown a chair at his teacher and told me I was a f***ng four eyed fat b**tard when I was summoned to sort out the mayhem he was causing"

She knew her rights you see.

And so do the children these days, I wouldn't want to be a school teacher for all the world today.
Although things have generally much improved, some issues have gone too far.

[Paul Barker]

Wo respect bro. Who the ecks Tom Fletcher anyway.

I had to leave nursing because of M.E. (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome) but it coincided with two other things a breakdown (probably just the psychological element of M.E.) and the shere trechery of a female colleague out for my blood, just because I wouldn't have a reliationship with her. Hell hath no scorn like a jilted would be lover female. No time or will to go into it but she told immense lies about me that were so awful that my position was untenable as she held a position of power and was believed.

Similarly to you the stress of dealing with agressive parents was unbelieveable. Chiled abusers claimed when their baby had broken femur that could have only been forseably snapped by a very strong man ( the father) that the male nurse had done it while doing an escort with the child. Fortunately for me there was a female paramedic present. They'll always believe a female in children's work but a male once acused is guilty.


Then there were the women who used the ward as a refuge to hide from violent partners, bringing baby with non existant. diarrhoea. Then they would say you musn't let my partner in, I would phone the Police and they would say "whatever you do don't confront him, he's on the run, last time we tried to catch him he took out four policemen" that's all very well, but I was responsible for al the children on the ward, if he came I would have to be a barrier between him and them. I had another father ready to attack me, you can't do anything until they do, I said to the staff be by the phone the moment he punches me get the Police. Actually nurses take a huge amount of abuse. There was the mother who hung herself at 4am while I was in charge I found here hanging by a lamp chord in the parents area and managed to save her life. She wasunderstandably in a psychotic state. Again I had a ward frull of children to protect, I had to deal with her and woory about all the seriously ill children, and keep her apart from them. At night staffing levels are very low and your own abilities are impared. Many nights I stayed with dying children fighting for their lives all through without a second's loss of conscentration. In the end I snapped.

Of course the Police were imensely supportive of us, but they couldn't afford to be present in case something happened, we could only call them when it went off. i did once have a policeman on the ward all night, he kept out of site, but a great comfort it was to know he was just a door away. Another time at Jimmy's we had a plain clothes policeman parent sudenly lunge at another parent, arrest him and got his colleages to march him off. Then we had the parent's who stole a car to get to a and e, we took hold of the poorly child and the closely following Police took hold of the parents.

But the worst thing was the children that died despite our best efforts, they darined us to the core. You can only give so much of yourself and then you;re spent.